An Unrelished Fate
by heykyra13
Summary: At one point in time, his heart was capable of emotion. He could feel. Love, hate, fear, even pity...Now...All was empty. All that was left of his once thriving heart was no longer his...
1. Default Chapter

AN: Kay, I'm giving this a shot. I've been working on this idea for about a week or two, and I wanna see how it plays out. I'm going to warn you now, this is gonna be really confusing right from the beginning, and will slowly trickle down to making sense toward the end, but I want to see if I can't do this the way I want to. Bare with me, if you get lost. Don't worry, you're kinda supposed to. If you're not interested, don't worry about it. This is sort of an experiment, but feel free to review anyway. Any and all suggestions are welcome. Stay crazy. ~hEyKyRa13  
  
PS- of course, the usuals... no, I don't own just about anybody you will encounter in this fanfic..  
  
***  
  
An Unrelished Fate  
  
Prologue  
  
***  
  
I deserve my fate.  
  
The silver-haired demon breathed a heavy sigh, yet still unable to release the burden on his heart. The burden will always remain, though. Nothing he did could every change that, now. He had made his decision long ago, and he was now where he belonged.  
  
Opening his amber hued eyes, his gaze drifted below. A child was crying. His brows creased together as he stared, unmoving.  
  
I could shed tears once... but not anymore.  
  
At one point in time, his heart was capable of emotion. He could feel. Love, hate, fear, even pity- all were living, breathing souls within his own. Now, as he watched the weeping child, everything inside him was gone. All was empty. All that was left of his once thriving heart was no longer his to dwell upon. Just mere memories dancing almost mockingly around his consciousness.  
  
He shuddered.  
  
The memories.  
  
While all else was thrown to the flames, the memories were left for the sole purpose of remembering. Remembering his life. Remembering all he had lost. Remembering all he had given up. While they had been long lost from the minds of many, within him they existed for the single function of plaguing his already torn and weary soul with unadulterated suffering.  
  
The child sniffed. The hanyou smirked.  
  
I'm used to that thing called suffering.  
  
Finally, Inuyasha turned from the distressed child and began walking away. Clouded, vacant eyes looked ahead, yet with the knowledge that there was nothing out there for him. Nothing more than what he already had- nothing.  
  
I deserve my fate.  
  
***  
  
AN: Well? How are you? Are you in a state of utter loss and confusion yet?... Yeah, well, this is my attempt. Let me know what you think, cause your opinions will determine whether or not this thing will keep going. 


	2. To be or Not to be

AN: Wow! I got replies!! *sniff*  
  
Anyway, just giving responses to reviewers:  
  
Issa-chan: I wish I could explain why Inuyasha is heartless, but I promise that will come later. It's one of those things that will be revealed toward the end... unless you can figure it out on your own, which you might be able to do. Otherwise, I'm glad you like it.  
  
Mysterious_Kitsune:...  
  
Larnom: Yeah, Bonnie-san! I'm happy you didn't find it too confusing... by the way, you still have my books and dvd, and I finally got the 5th volume, but left it at Heather's house... tink- a-link...hee  
  
IceSpikeXBlackRose: *holds up fist menacingly* Grr you, Heather! Grr you!  
  
Nehokia Nazaumi: *sweatdrops* Yeah, well, sorry for the confusion... but, if you want, you can email me your ideas and I'll let ya know if you're close!^-^  
  
Thanks for the reviews! I'll do my best to come up with chapter 2, soon!... and as for you, Heather... JUST SHUT UP!... hee, you know I love ya... sometimes...  
  
***  
  
An Unrelished Fate  
  
Chapter 1  
  
To be or not to be  
  
***  
  
Why am I still here?  
  
"Kagome!"  
  
Dark brown eyes snapped open, startled. Pushing her cheek off her propped palm, the young girl looked around for the source of the familiar voice. A strange tapping sound alerted her attention to the ground. A small, leather black toe of a shoe drummed the tiled floor impatiently. Kagome stiffened as her eyes slowly traveled up the length of the leg, past the pleated short, jade skirt on which a pair of smooth hands were planted, over the cleanly pressed, white sailor's shirt and finally halting at the pursed lips, furrowed eyes and piercing eyes.  
  
Kagome gulped.  
  
Uh-oh.  
  
"Uh... hi, Yuki," she said tentatively.  
  
The girl's frown did not lift. "Kagome! What do you think you are doing, sleeping at a time like this!"  
  
Kagome, not understanding her friend's implication, blinked, staring at her, bewildered. "A... time like what?"  
  
Yuki's jaw dropped and eyes widened. Kagome felt like she had just asked a first grade math problem for all the utter amazement her question brought upon her friend. Struggling to regain her composure, Yuki instead leaned forward to rest her palm on Kagome's forehead.  
  
"Yuki! What are you-"  
  
"Shhh!" she hissed, readjusting her hand. "I think you may be coming down with a fever."  
  
Temper flaring, Kagome whipped Yuki's hand from her head and twisting her wrist, finally stood up and slammed her hand against the desktop.  
  
"Yuki, would you stop playing games, already? What are you talking about?"  
  
"Hojo, you moron!" Yuki spat back.  
  
Simultaneously, Kagome released the girl's wrist, sinking back into her chair, mind spinning. "What!?"  
  
Jerking her hand away from Kagome, Yuki rubbed her wrist gingerly, glaring at her. "You're movie date with Hojo! Remember? The one me and Eri set up for you last week? Don't tell me you forgot!"  
  
Still confused, Kagome opened her mouth to speak but found no time for words to come out as Yuki promptly reached forward to grab Kagome's shirt and yank her out of her seat. Wordlessly, Yuki stormed out of the classroom and down the corridor, towing the helpless girl behind her.  
  
Kagome, unable to stop her mission-bound friend, merely tried to keep up, stray thoughts drifting across her mind.  
  
A date? With Hojo? When did I ever agree to this?  
  
Almost as soon as the thought crossed her mind, Kagome mentally scolded herself.  
  
Naturally, I didn't. Yuki and Eri agreed to it... not me.  
  
Outside the school, Kagome finally regained control and wrenched herself from Yuki's grasp. Ignoring the action, however, the girl merely snorted and glanced sternly at Kagome from over her shoulder. "You just stay here, Kagome. I'm sure he's probably waiting for you."  
  
Before Kagome could retaliate, Yuki briskly spun around and walked around the corner of the building.  
  
The abandoned girl stood watching her walk away, her anger finally subsiding as she emitted a heavy sigh. Despite her barbaric methods, Yuki was only after her best interests, Kagome knew. Aggression was her way of expressing herself, so to speak.  
  
Suddenly, Kagome dipped her head and chuckled, long, raven bangs bouncing in front of her clouded eyes.  
  
Poor Yuki. She tries so hard to make me happy... she just doesn't get it.  
  
Rubbing her arm, Kagome lifted her head and looked around. She was alone. Everyone else had left long ago. She smirked.  
  
Alone... again.  
  
A cool draft breezing through the campus woke Kagome from her daze, lifting the strands of her dark tresses on its breath. Irritated, Kagome abruptly pulled them back behind her ear and folded her arms across her chest, jamming her hand into the warm folds. With a brief glance back in the direction Yuki disappeared, Kagome shook her head and closed her eyes, allowing her feet to start walking. The direction they headed didn't really matter- just as long as they took her away from everything she needed to get away from.  
  
Why am I still here?  
  
***  
  
AN: And so the plot thickens... yeah, I know this is probably lame, though, and I apologize for the supreme cheeziness of it all. But oddities aside, anybody got questions? I'll try to answer them the best I can, and if you don't, then all I ask is to let me know if it's too bizarre for your liking. If it is, I'll change it, but I ask you wait it out just a bit before you decide. I may just have a few surprises in store for ya! ^-^' ~hEyKyRa13 


	3. A need for justice

AN: Bonjour, mes amis. And before you start hurling random food at me, let me acknowledge the fact that there was absolutely no connection between the prologue and chapter 1. Don't worry, I know. And, I promise it will have a tie-in at the end. I also realize I say this a lot but......... bare with me? ~hEyKyRa13  
  
Review responses:  
  
IceSpikeXBlackRose: *glares* No! It was not Jay! It was me!......... and the disturbing book called Metamorphosis......... so keep Jay out of it!......... now Jim on the otherhand.........  
  
Nehokia Nazaumi: Well, Inuyasha did sorta do something, but I promise you'll find out at the end......... which I have already officially written, so instead of weeks between each chapter (there ended up being seven in all) it'll hopefully only be a few days!  
  


* * *

  
An Unrelished Fate  
  
Chapter 2  
  
A Need for Justice  
  


* * *

  
I mustn't stop.  
  
With his hands tucked into his sleeves, Inuyasha trudged on, blind to all the life swirling around him. His eyes narrowed. The sights, the sounds, the people- all so full of life and exuberance- all taunting him with their false promises of happiness and peace. They hovered around him, laughing and jeering at him, lingering just out of his reach. He sighed.  
  
Life is for the living.  
  
So why did he stay? Even Kikyo was curious about his endeavors, those of which he spoke to no one about. His fate was one dealt to him as a direct result of his own choices, and so shall the consequences.  
  
He did not expect to receive mercy for his decision. The idea of righting his unjustifiable wrong with his path of suffering never breached the hanyou's mind. Instead, he only sought to experience the pain he knew he deserved- the pain he himself delivered......... to her.  
  
Inuyasha smirked. Who would have guessed the once feared half-demon could be so just a person?  
  
He could not restore all that he had done. To ask for forgiveness was unthinkable. Instead, he did nothing more than abide by his own philosophy- to those who deliver pain, pain must be delivered. In a place where all residents were beyond physical pain, Inuyasha probed into the depths of himself, and his shattered heart, and discovered the means by which to satisfy his need for retribution.  
  
He thought of Kikyo.  
  
I've broken enough hearts. Now it's my turn.  
  
The hanyou looked around him, for the first time conscious of his surroundings, and almost smiled.  
  
And what better way to do it than here?  
  
With a sigh, Inuyasha lifted his bare feet and made his way up the steps.  
  
He was beyond caring. Beyond pity. Beyond hatred. Beyond worry, and self-concern, and vengeance. But no matter how hard he tried, he could not rid himself of the guilt. It watched over him, guarding his heart from any compassion that might try to enter. Like with the loss of the life-giving oxygen that flowed through his heart, bringing forth the solid beat, reaffirming his existence, so he gave up love. Such a thing is meant for those who deserve it. Not for him.  
  
Which is exactly why I'm here.  
  
Squeezing his eyes shut, he pushed himself forward, ignoring the small pleas within him to turn back. Somewhere inside him, a voice said to turn back. It told him that he didn't need to go through with this. That he had done enough.  
  
No.  
  
Casting the lone thoughts aside, Inuyasha continued on, pressing onward. For all the suffering he had caused, he was finally fulfilling the consequences he deserved.  
  
The voice was wrong. He had done too much. He needed to suffer.  
  
I mustn't stop.  
  


* * *

  
AN: Well? How am I doing? Sorry for the wait......... the chapters aren't that difficult to write......... it's just the opening and closing sentences that are hard to think of......... cause they kind of are the theme for the chapter, you know? Anyway, please review, and I'll get to the 3rd chapter......... as soon as I think of another sentence......... hee......... 


	4. Confrontations

AN: Hello, again......... ~hEyKyRa13  
  
Review responses:  
  
PurpleRoses: Sorry I didn't get to you last time, but I'm glad you're enjoying it!  
  
UnitX2-5: Well, just because you asked, here's the next chapter!  
  
Sayori-chan: It's true people are getting confused, but at least for once, confusion is what I'm kinda aiming for! And yes, Inuyasha is heartless, but for a different reason than most will think.........  
  
Akaro: I wish I could tell you what was happening, but trust me, it'll be more worth it to wait and find out. If I were to blow it now, the rest of the story would be spoiled. It's the surprising ending that I think really makes it interesting! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ An Unrelished Fate Chapter 3 Confrontations ------------------------------------------------------------------------ What's wrong with me?  
  
Kagome sighed, clutching her thin jacket closer as the wind picked up again. With her eyes focused on the ground, she walked, not needing her sight to traverse around the familiar streets.  
  
She frowned. Seriously, though. Hojo is a really nice guy. He's smart, he's athletic, not to mention good-looking......... really good- looking. All the girls are crazy about him......... why not me?  
  
Unexpectedly, a single tear swelled in the corner of her eye, quickly growing heavy enough to break free and cascade down her cheek.  
  
Cause you don't love him.  
  
Suddenly growing furious, Kagome spied a pinecone settled on the ground, and with no reason at all, swung her foot at it. The cone went flying, vanishing behind the roof of a grocery store across the street.  
  
Watching it fall, Kagome furrowed her brows, snorted, and jammed her hands into her jacket pockets, storming away angrily.  
  
"Geez, Kagome, get over yourself!" she exclaimed aloud. "Stop getting so emotional! He didn't care about you, so get over it!"  
  
"Hojo's a really nice guy. No- a great guy. A perfect guy. The guy of any girl's dreams, including yours. So stop being a crybaby and get your butt back to that school!"  
  
With her spirits rejuvenated, Kagome spun around.  
  
"What?"  
  
Kagome's eyes widened.  
  
"I'm......... home."  
  
Unintentionally, by not paying attention to the direction she had been moving, she found herself standing in front of her own house.  
  
Almost scared, Kagome took a step back, startled. It was almost as if her feet betrayed her heart's secrets. Though she tried to trick her mind into thinking otherwise, her feet were not so easily fooled.  
  
Kagome squeezed her eyes shut. Now the tears were coming in full force, a battalion fiercely attacking her quivering eyelids. She couldn't cry. Not now. Not after all she had just said. Crying would only prove that she did care- care that he left her.  
  
Furiously wiping her threatening tears away with her sleeve, she turned and faced the gate.  
  
"I have to go back to the school," she told herself firmly. "I have to get to Hojo."  
  
But her feet resisted. Each step she took toward the exit proved harder than the last. Kagome was weakening. The strength of both her feet and her tears were overwhelming.  
  
Finally, just as she reached the first step, she collapsed to her knees, her face sinking into her hands. With no more will left to fight, she allowed the tears to flow freely, now, finally giving in to the truth. She did care.  
  
"Who am I kidding?" she whispered, chuckling mockingly at herself. "Of course you care, Kagome. You always have."  
  
Placing her hands on the wall, she struggled to pull herself up, failing many times and falling back to the ground before she finally got to her feet, trembling furiously. Forcing her eyes upward, she gazed at the tall tree, standing strong in defiance to her weakness. Through her blurred vision, she saw his face, smiling down at her through the foliage. A second wave of tears overtook her.  
  
"Was it me? Was it me and my stupid weakness that drove you away?" she asked the illusion desparately. "Of course it was. Kikyo was much stronger. She wasn't a crybaby- an immature, sniveling little weakling like I am."  
  
Slowly, her gaze drifted from the tree to the shrine. The door was open, exposing the ancient well within.  
  
Kagome took a step toward it, this time without struggling against her feet for dominance.  
  
"I didn't even put up a fight when she took you," she whispered. "When she took you away from me, I didn't do anything."  
  
What's wrong with me?  
  
***  
  
AN: So, you're finally getting some details about what's going on, but hopefully don't know too much, yet. If I'm lucky, I'll leave you hanging just enough so that at the end (or close enough to the end) you'll find out the truth and be shocked......... *hiss* Heather, don't even say a word......... yeah, and I'm so proud of myself, too, cause I wrote this in the same day as the last chapter! This (for those who don't know me) is incredibly rare, so enjoy it while it lasts. Not to mention I seriously feel like I'm in a writing mood, and might even finish this either today or tomorrow! (Probably tomorrow since I have to leave for work in about two hours.........) But hey! At least you're getting something to read, right? 


	5. The thoughts of a drifting hanyou

AN: Kay, I'm starting Chapter 4 on the same day I finished Chapter's 2 and 3......... let's see how far I can get in one day!  
  
~Questions to Ponder~  
  
What is Inuyasha's plan?  
  
Where did Kikyo take him that was away from Kagome?  
  
Why did he go in the first place?  
  
4) Who is the "her" he keeps referring to?  
  
"When" is Inuyasha? Past, or Present?  
  
6) How......... hang on, thinking up a "how" question......... um.........How is the fic going so far?  
  
~hEyKyRa13  
  
Review Responses:  
  
Inuyashagirl1: *gulp* Um......... okay? I'll get a chapter up either today or tomorrow, promise, just *cringe* PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!!!!!  
  
UnitX2-5: Heh, well, thanks.......... I am proud of it, but honestly, I think you're giving me a little too much credit......... sure, it might be different, but its really not as good as you make it sound.........  
  
Larnom: *hiss* Yeah, when are you EVER gonna be home so I can call you????? ....... Grr, you, Bonnie-san......... anyway, I'll keep updating, and tell Janelle that Stephanie says hi, I saw her on Friday....  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------------ An Unrelished Fate  
  
Chapter 4  
  
The thoughts of a drifting hanyou  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------------ This is it.  
  
Inuyasha paused, looking up at the large Higurashi estate. His eyes took care to not miss any details- the chipped, white paint on the far corner, veiled by the shrubbery; the soft, cotton drapes that fluttered lightly by the partially opened window next to the door, despite its own restraints; the faded mat lying on the ground that brandished the word "Welcome" to all its weary guests seeking refuge. Slowly, his gaze drifted to the second story window, dark with emptiness. She wasn't home.  
  
With a sigh, Inuyasha turned and walked toward the shrine. The door was open, almost inviting him in. Not that an open door would matter to him, though.  
  
Entering, he hesitated before walking forward, eyes staring at the well. The voice was returning. It was ordering him to turn back. It was telling him he had suffered enough. That it was finally time for peace.  
  
"No," he said aloud, almost startling himself with his own voice, so long forgotten with neglect. "I can't. I have to stay."  
  
I have to, he thought, willing himself forward, almost smiling to comfort himself. During my lifetime......... I've been through so much; I almost thought there was nothing left. Nothing left that could cause me any pain.  
  
The shuffling of his feet finally came to a stop as he sank down in front of the well, staring down into its shadowy depth.  
  
This is the only way I can still feel pain.  
  
His life was over, now. Nothing life offered did he feel he deserved. Nothing else mattered. But to stay within the confines of oblivion wasn't enough. Instead, one could almost view it as an escape. An easy way out of giving back all he had stolen. He couldn't allow himself the luxury.  
  
Happiness. All his life, the word was nothing more than a mere fantasy- like every other good thing that happened to all others, the concept was never his; could never be his; always just beyond his reach. And so he grew up, conscious of this one idea that had practically become fact- he was destined to always be unhappy. Unhappy, and lonely.  
  
Then that girl came.  
  
She came to shatter all of the truths his life was based upon. She stubbornly tore down the firmly built walls around his life and heart, and tramped across them like they were no stronger than twigs.  
  
During the moments he shared with her, he had almost forgotten. But now, he was remembering. Remembering and finally acting upon what he remembered.  
  
What better way to feel true torture than to watch the girl above all boundaries experience those he always knew he could never have?  
  
He knew he might be happy for her- Kagome- that girl that defied all reason. All his reason. But inside, it would hurt. Hurt far more than anything he could ever physically do to himself.  
  
Pain. Agony. All of it- he deserved it. And he would make sure he was spared none.  
  
Suddenly, soft footsteps alerted his attention once again. Someone was coming.  
  
Inuyasha sighed, and slowly turned around.  
  
This is it.  
  
***  
  
AN: Yeah! You finally know something! Inuyasha's plan! And I'm sure a few of you might even be able to figure out of what's going on that involves our poor hanyou. Anyway, three chapters in two hours! Go me!......... heh, well, I probably would have written more if I didn't get sidetracked with reading so many other Inuyasha fics......... well, to her credit, the author is definitely second to none! Check her stuff out! Name- Of Memories Past......... like I said, fiction at its best! 


	6. Confessions at the well

AN: Okay, going for chapter number 5 with only thirty minutes remaining! Can she do it? Is she really capable of writing four chapters in one day?......... we shall soon see......... ~hEyKyRa13 Review Responses:  
  
IceSpikeXBlackRose: *sigh* for the last time...*inhales deeply* IT'S NOT JAY, GOT IT!!!  
  
Miko of the inocent: *gulp* yes, yes, I promise it'll have a happy ending... and by the way, I never realized I had my stuff filtered in the first place. Thank you!  
  
Rekouri Sentusu: Well I can't just TELL you what's going on! But I will say that a lot of the answers will come in the last few chapters. In all, there are only two more chapters after this one, and the last one is much longer than the others, so I'm sure you'll be satisfied.  
  
Sayori-chan: Hmmm, does he deserve the pain he's getting... I wish I could even give you a hint, you know I do, but I musn't... Like I told Rekouri Sentusu, you'll probably find out in the next two chapters.  
  
Akaro: Well, I don't want to give anything away, so I won't agree to whether or not he kills Kagome (^-^' I'll just leave that one up to your imaginations to figure out!) but I will say that just about everything will be explained in some form or other by the end.  
  
ssp51201: *grin* I'm glad you're enjoying it. I honestly didn't think it would end up getting this popular, but you peoples must be nuts or something for actually liking it. Anyway, the plight of Inuyasha and Kagome's relationship is nothing new, they go through it throughout the entire series... I just happen to take a different spin on... let's just say a common theme...  
  
*added note* and as for the above note... RILEY, DON'T YOU DARE SAY A WORD!!!!!!  
  
An Unrelished Fate  
  
Chapter 5  
  
Confessions at the well  
  
You idiot.  
  
Slowly, Kagome kneeled in front of the well and leaned forward, resting her chin on the ancient wooden wall. Her eyes drifted around in the darkness below, wondering if she could see the bottom, and knowing it wouldn't matter if she could. Nothing could bring him back. He was gone forever.  
  
With a sigh, Kagome shifted her position, lying her cheek on the cold wood, ignoring the flight of the tears across all the corners of her face.  
  
"Good job, Kagome," she scolded, sobbing. "Look at how weak you are. Crying like this. You should be ashamed of yourself."  
  
With a choked laughter, she smirked. "Heck, anybody in their right mind would be laughing at you, right now. Laughing at how stupid and weak you look, and how pathetic you really are."  
  
"Why in the world did you ever think he even cared about you in the first place? He hated you. He called you wench every opportunity he got; he thought you were lazy and selfish for wanting to go home when there were still jewel shards to be found; he hated always having to save you because you were too weak to take care of yourself. You were always in his way, you idiot. How could you even imagine it was ever anything different?"  
  
Frustrated with herself, the tears came harder as her voice rose. "He never loved you! He's always loved Kikyo! You stupid little idiot. All you'd ever do is sit there and imagine he'd sweep you up in his arms and say, 'Kagome, I love you,' but it was all just a joke!"  
  
Suddenly drained, Kagome sank into silence again; a silence that was ruptured only by her occasional sobs. Curling herself into a ball, she hugged her legs to her chest and leaned her temple against the wall, staring at the ground.  
  
"Great job, Kagome. Falling in love with someone who would never love you in return. Great job."  
  
Kagome sniffled, squeezing her eyes shut.  
  
You idiot.  
  
*** AN: Yes, Yes, I know, this chapter was short, but there was only so much I could have Kagome say about herself before I started repeating things, right? Anyway, I'm gonna pause and get dressed for work and see if I can't bust out another chapter before I leave. Maybe I'll even get in a chapter after work?......... Wow, I can't believe how close to the end I'm getting on this. I think there's really only about three or four chapter's left. If I'm still in this writing mood tomorrow, I'll definitely have it all done then! 


	7. Wrong Choices

AN: Hey, going for the fifth chapter in a row, here. I have twenty minutes left, so we'll see. By the way, thinking more about this, I think I might only have two chapters left, including this one, depending on what I want to do for the ending......... oh well, let's see if I can't get that chapter out! ~hEyKyRa13  
  
Review Responses:  
  
Mistress of the Wind: *smile* Glad you approve!  
  
Sayori-chan: Heh, honestly, I'm glad I update often, too... my friends (IceSpikexBlackRose and Larnom) know all too well how impatient I get when I have something written and I really want them all to read it!  
  
Akaro: Don't worry, I'm pretty sure the answer to your "Is Inuyasha gonna kill Kagome?" question will be answered in this chapter. Only one more to go!  
  
Rekouri Sentusu: email me if you think you know, and at the very least I can tell you whether or not you're right!  
  
IceSpikeXBlackRose: *sigh* As I've answered on the phone, no. In case you haven't noticed, each chapter revolves around either Kagome or Inuyasha, alternating between the two. And the first and last sentences of each chapter are identical and also coming from their thoughts.  
  
Girl-InuYasha: *evil grin* But Kikyo IS dead, isn't she?  
  
Thanks for your reviews! They've been such an awesome inspiration for me!!!! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ An Unrelished Fate  
  
Chapter 6  
  
Wrong choices  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------------ This wasn't supposed to happen.  
  
Inuyasha stared powerlessly at Kagome, crumbling before him, sobbing mercilessly. Not only was he amazed, but he was also confused.  
  
Was he feeling pain? Yes, but this wasn't the pain he had in mind.  
  
Kagome was supposed to go on living without him, something that should have hurt him. She was supposed to laugh, and smile, and run, and jump, and live without worrying about him or the jewel shards. She was supposed to grow up, and fall in love with someone that wasn't him, and he was supposed to hate whatever guy it was, but feel helpless because there was nothing he could do about it. And they were supposed to get married, and have children, and live that happy existence he could only dream about.  
  
Kagome wasn't supposed to be here, crying over him. She wasn't supposed to be yelling at herself, or be angry with Kikyo, or any of these things.  
  
She wasn't supposed to love him.  
  
But, for some bizarre reason, she did. Even now, after he was gone, she was feeling pain.  
  
Kagome, what are you doing? You're not supposed to be hurting! You're not supposed to cry!  
  
Without warning, the development of moisture in his own eyes startled him. His clawed finger gingerly touched the skin beneath his eye, and was stunned when it found wetness. Was he......... crying?  
  
He thought he was beyond all emotions. He thought his heart was cold, and empty- lifeless. In a world where life is nothing but a mere memory, he thought he had forgotten how to care.  
  
His eyes widened as he shook his head, the truth finally becoming clear.  
  
No.  
  
Everything he thought was wrong. About himself; about Kagome- all of it.  
  
He was so blind. Blinded to Kagome's affections toward him; blinded toward even his own heart, something he mistakenly thought had been left behind with his body. All the decisions he had made, believing they were what a lowly hanyou like him deserved, were wrong.  
  
Inuyasha blinked, stunned. There she was, Kagome, the most perfect creature in the world, and she was suffering because of him.  
  
"I never wanted this!" he screamed, breaking down beside her. Ignoring the fact that she couldn't feel him, he pressed himself against her small, trembling frame, wrapping both arms around her and burying his face in her hair. In that moment, he became painfully aware of the fact that he couldn't smell her, anymore. No longer could his fingertips caress her skin. Eyes squeezed shut, he screamed, "I just wanted to do things the right way, for once. To stop causing so much pain."  
  
"I never wanted this," he said finally, his voice lowering in a slow decrescendo to a whisper.  
  
A single tear rolled down his face, hesitating at his chin before it fell.  
  
This wasn't supposed to happen. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ AN: Big emotional moment......... and to those who are wondering (yeah, which is probably no one) I did finish the chapter before I left, but this note was written after I got home......... more like 10:30. Now, I am very determined to write the last chapter tonight. Let's see if that happens!  
  
PS- how was the chapter, by the way? Are things starting to piece together or are you still confused? In all honesty, this one was kinda rushed cause I sorta left late, so that's my excuse for the lack of quality in this chapter, but hopefully, the next one (probably the last) will be much better. 


	8. A second chance

AN: Okay, so I think this is the last chapter. Hopefully, all your questions will be answered......... and if they're not......... well, I guess that's when you can start throwing the pies......... except for YOU, Heather!......... *grin*......... And as sad and depressing as this fic seems, I promise there's a happy ending! ~hEyKyRa13  
  
demented-squrriel: DING DING DING DING DINGGGGGG!!!!!!  
  
Mistress of the Wind: All shall be explained in this super long chapter......... well, technically its not all that long, but its much longer than the others......... at any rate, its more reading material for ya! ^-^'  
  
It's been awesome reading all your reviews, and I really hope you all enjoy my last chapter.  
  
***  
  
An Unrelished Fate  
  
Chapter 7  
  
A Second Chance  
  
***  
  
Inuyasha.  
  
Kagome sniffed, eyes red from crying. Taking one glance at the well, tears returned and she tucked her head back into her arms.  
  
"Inuyasha."  
  
Suddenly, she became aware of something on the back of her neck. Startled, Kagome slowly slid her fingers to the exposed skin, her fingertips brushing against something wet. She gasped.  
  
"Kagome."  
  
Eyes widening, Kagome jerked her head up. A head of smooth, silvery hair buried itself onto her shoulder, shaking as it emitted soft sobs.  
  
For a moment, Kagome scolded herself. Her imaginary illusions have gone too far, this time. She couldn't bare it.  
  
But when her sudden movement caused the head to shift, rolling around until a face could be seen, Kagome uttered another gasp. Slowly, the eyelids fluttered open to reveal a surprisingly familiar pair of golden amber hued eyes.  
  
Kagome's own eyes swelled with even more tears. "Inuyasha?"  
  
Stunned that he heard her speak his name, Inuyasha sat up and stared into Kagome's eyes, trying to determine whether it was recognition he saw in them, or it was just his own mind playing tricks on him.  
  
"Are you......... real?" Kagome asked, her voice barely above a whisper, breathing becoming a labored task.  
  
"I......... don't know," Inuyasha admitted, not sure if she could even hear him. So many things were happening at once, leaving the hanyou extremely confused.  
  
Tentatively, he lifted a hand to his chest, stunned by the thumping he felt in response. The warmth that surged from fingertip to chest left a strange, tingling sensation from reuse. The same occurred when his hand was lifted to his own face, briefly feeling the passing of air as it crossed his open mouth.  
  
Kagome watched as he glanced at his hand, disbelief washing over his features. For a split second, his tawny eyes flicked toward her own, and reflexively, his hand reached out for her face. Kagome held her breath, staring unwaveringly at his approaching fingers.  
  
Half expecting his hand, and the rest of his body, to dissolve inches in front of her face, confirming her belief of him being an illusion, Kagome's breath was released abruptly when she felt his skin brush lightly against her own. Her lips hung slightly parted, her breath escaping her at uneven intervals. Her eyes were imprisoned within the confines of the hanyou's own intense gaze.  
  
"You're......... alive?" she said softly, sure her voice was drowned out by the pounding of her heart against her chest. Despite her extreme efforts, another tear released itself, leaving a glistening trace of its path down her cheek.  
  
Involuntarily, Inuyasha's hand tenderly brushed the falling tear away, lingering momentarily to trace his fingertip along the moistened path before cupping her cheek. His own cheeks stretched taught as he offered the girl a ghost of a smile.  
  
"I guess."  
  
"B-but," Kagome stammered, still not wanting to give in for fear that she still might be dreaming, "you're dead! I saw you! You went.........you chose to go......... with her......... Kikyo........."  
  
"Kagome," he whispered hoarsely, brows furrowing as he brought his other hand to her open cheek, forcing her to look at him. The girl gasped when she discovered his normally hard, cold eyes glistening with tears. "Please forgive me."  
  
"F-forgive you?" she stuttered, overwhelmed by his unabashed show of emotions. "Why?"  
  
All at once, Inuyasha drew back his arms and, taking her with them, crushed her petite frame to his chest, burying his tear-strewn face into her shoulder. Caught off guard by the sudden blow, Kagome remained motionless as the hanyou's grip on her grew tighter and tighter, as if he was scared anything less would end with him losing her again.  
  
Realizing the overwhelming strength of his forceful grasp, Inuyasha eased his hold, but refused to let go. Snaking his arms across her shoulders and around her waist, he pulled her upward and leaned his head closer to her ear.  
  
"Forgive me for all the mistakes I've made," he said in a hushed voice. "I've made so many, and like the idiot I was, it took something as big as hell to make me finally realize the greatest mistake of all."  
  
Kagome's heart began to race like lightening as the tension mounted, and he knew it. Patiently, he felt content to wait, reveling in her presence in his arms.  
  
Kagome was speechless. She honestly didn't know what to say. Still reeling from his sudden rise from the dead, Inuyasha's candid words left her staggering. She was unaccustomed to the hanyou behaving so openly, especially about the feelings he had for so long kept guarded. And to express these feelings in both words and action so suddenly, such a concept was hardly imagined by her, and certainly not expected.  
  
Realizing he was waiting for her to respond, Kagome opened her mouth, only to stutter childishly, "W-what w-was that?"  
  
Inuyasha sighed, and slowly pulled away just enough so that he could look into her troubled eyes, hoping she understood and accepted the sincerity of his words.  
  
"Fooling myself into thinking I could survive, even in death, without you."  
  
Kagome inhaled steeply, eyes widening.  
  
Can this really be Inuyasha? she marveled, finally starting to give in to the possibility that he wasn't a delusion.  
  
"But Kikyo........."  
  
"-has nothing more to do with me," Inuyasha replied calmly, sweeping a stray stand of ebony hair back behind her ear, studying her visage lovingly. "I followed Kikyo thinking it would satisfy the guilt I have carried with me for so many years. It took me so long- too long- to understand that she never held the place in my heart that you do, Kagome."  
  
"Inuyasha, w-what are you s-saying?" she whispered, against her better senses stubbornly praying she wasn't about to imagine his words.  
  
"Don't you know?" Inuyasha said, affectionately rubbing his thumb against her cheek. Tilting his head slightly to the left, refusing his eyes pardon to stray from her face, his timid smile metamorphosized into something more real. "Kagome......... I love you."  
  
Kagome blinked once, then twice. At first, only the sound of her own heart hammering against her ears broke the silence. Then, as her tears emerged once again, this time they were accompanied by the creeping of her mouth into a beaming smile. For the first time that day, she finally believed that she wasn't dreaming.  
  
In a sudden move that almost surprised Inuyasha himself, Kagome leaped forward, coiling her arms in a fierce hug around his neck, laughing joyously. After the initial shock, Inuyasha grinned and returned the embrace.  
  
"I love you, too, Inuyasha."  
  
Kagome wasn't the only one who was having difficulty accepting the reality of it all. Inuyasha could hardly believe Kagome was in his arms, telling him that she was his. He couldn't believe he was even alive again.  
  
So this is happiness, he thought, filling his nostrils with her alluring scent. His clawed hands dug through her hair, enjoying the feel of the silky strands slipping between his fingers. Her sculpted body pressed against his introduced a searing heat that burned along the surface of his skin. Satisfied with merely holding her close, knowing she wouldn't run away, brought about a novel sense of security and peace.  
  
Kagome felt Inuyasha's ease and smiled, breathing in deeply. She loved him, and he loved her back. She didn't dare think this was all another fabrication of her imagination, all for the fear that she might be right. Instead, she felt content to dwell only on the miracle before her.  
  
Inuyasha.  
  
***  
  
Epilogue  
  
***  
  
"So, Inuyasha. You have made your choice, I see."  
  
The priestess refused to smile, but surprisingly felt no bitterness toward either the hanyou she had released, or her own reincarnation that had stole him from her. Perhaps it was the afterlife finally settling her long tormented soul.  
  
Her eyes narrowed as she watched them, clinging to each other in an illusionary bliss. Finally, she slowly closed her eyes and turned, walking away from the lovers.  
  
"I trust you to found in that girl what you failed to find in me, Inuyasha."  
  
***end***  
  
AN: IT'S FINALLY OVER!!!! THE FIRST REAL FIC (besides the *ahem* DBZ......... thing.........) I'VE EVER FINISHED!!!!!......... I'm actually really excited. This didn't turn out too bad......... especially for something that was only initially intended for an experiment. What do you guys think?  
  
Well, my first Inuyasha fic over and done with......... what now? I still have "A Fairy Tale" to finish, although I assure you, it will never ever in a billion years be as quick in writing as this. But, I do have a possibility to work on for another Inuyasha story that's in some ways similar to this one, although not nearly as short, and not nearly as dramatic. I'll have to play around with the idea a little more.  
  
But anyway, this is my farewell. Hope you all liked it!  
  
~hEyKyRa13  
  
And by the way, thanks to everyone for their replies! May it be known that they were always well appreciated! 


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